Saturday Stats: What will the Avs do during the Four Nations break?
Perry Nelson-Imagn Images
Two weeks off? I’m about to get so much done! It’s here, it’s really happening - the Four Nations break is upon us and I’m about to have so much more time for activities. I’m finally going to build that plant stand my girlfriend has been bugging me about since pre-season! She’s going to be so happy!
Obviously we know what Nathan MacKinnon, Cale Makar, Devon Toews, and Artturi Lehkonen will be doing - playing for Canada, Canada, Canada, and Finland, respectively, but what about the other dudes? Let’s go player by player and I’ll tell you exactly how they’re gonna spend their mini vacation.
Jusso Parssinen: Going with Lehky to Four Nations and paying for his own hotel room so he can hang out with Team Finland. They’re not gonna just let him into meetings or anything, but he will sneak in through the ducts to feel closer to his big brothers.
Parker Kelly: Cleaning toilets at the Denver Museum of Nature and Science - he just can’t get enough dirty work, and hey a free pass to look at all those Dinosaur skeletons is the kind of thing that gets your boy excited.
Jack Drury: Finally, a chance to get his bearings in Denver and find a decent place to try this green chili stuff everyone keeps talking about.
Ross Colton: Rossco looks like a guy who hangs out at ViewHouse downtown, a place one person recommended while I was in town for a comedy festival and all the comedians roasted me for going to when I told them. Sorry Ross! But look at his face right now and try to tell me I’m wrong - you can’t. You cannot lie to me.
Logan O’Connor: The break will give OC a chance to finally work on his true passion, unboxing groceries for elderly Costco members.
Miles Wood: Going on a roadtrip to try to track down Linus Karlsson and spear him in the nuts again.
Casey Mittelstadt: Taking two weeks to experience a hero’s journey and find himself again in a short film called How Casey Got His Groove Back.
Mackenzie Blackwood: He’ll be trying to stay sharp the only way he knows how, by going to an axe throwing bar and catching the axes before they hit the targets.
Scott Wedgewood: Ankle Rehab.
Gabe Landeskog: Knee Rehab
Josh Manson: Hand and Lower Body Rehab.
Valeri Nichushkin: All the Rehab
Calvin de Haan: Guest coaching his kid’s hockey team, but all the kids want to learn from him is why he’s struggled so much with the puck this season.
Sam Girard: Captaining a riverboat and Deuce Bigalowing your mom.
Oliver Kylington: Working on his color and pattern recognition so he can stop passing the puck to the other team so damn much.
Keaton Middleton: Chopping down trees. Not for fun, not for money. Just because they’re there.
Sam Malinski: Researching other NHL cities to be ready for the trade deadline.
Martin Necas: Taking online courses in sports business and finance so he can avoid getting into a Mikko-esque contract situation next season.
Joel Kiviranta: Sacrificing another goat at the altar of Lucifer so his shooting percentage doesn’t cool off.
Think I got one of these wrong? Correct me in the comments!
SATURDAY STATS
Ok it’s too early to come to any conclusions about this yet but let’s just enjoy it for now:
2: Points for Jack Drury as an Avalanche
9: Points for Martin Necas as an Avalanche
11: Points for Necas and Drury as Avalanche
2: Points for Mikko Rantanen as a Hurricane
Pretty good! Pretty, pretty good.
PREDICTIONS
My last column was two weeks and a whole Mikko Rantanen trade ago, and I only got one prediction right. I don’t have proof of most of my predictions for last week so I’ll just put myself down as 2-2 since I did get two right on the podcast. No games this week so I’ll just predict one thing:
Canada wins the Four Nations — they may have some question marks in goal, but the team is so deep and Nate, Cale, and Toewser are hard to pick against.
Season Total: 29-28
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